You won’t belive this.

March 4, 2011 at 12:52 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

The following story is true. However, it is not for the faint of heart. You might want to stop reading if you get grossed out easily.

The past few days have been a little rough to put it nicely. The kids have been cranky and fighting. It seems like someone is whinning or crying for about 75% of the day. This morning Jack was not feeling good. He isn’t whinning just lethargic and wants to cuddle. Leah of course decided that she would get into everything she could all morning to keep me from cuddling with Jack. She tried to chew on the lamp cord, pulled everything off the dinning room table and tried to eat a piece of cardboard. She is acting more like a puppy than a toddler.

We made it through the morning and I finally got the kids in their high chairs with some food while I finished up macaroni for lunch. Then I heard a terrible noise….I looked at Jack and knew it was going to be trouble. I took him back to the bedroom to change him and discovered he had poo up to his arm pits. How does that even happen? Then to my surprise I realized there were exactly four wipes left in the container. Four. This was not a four wipe project. This was a 24 wipe project. Why didn’t I fill up the container this morning?

I took everything off of Jack and started a pile for the laundry and set him in the bathroom while I got a wash cloth. While trying to find a wash cloth Leah decided to stick the handle side of her fork down her throat and gag herself. Awesome choice Leah.  So I took her fork away and went back to Jack, who took the liberty of peeing all over the bathroom while I was dealing with the fork issue. More laundry..we have  full load now. I finally got Jack cleaned up and headed back to the kitchen to check on Leah. While I was gone Leah took everything off of her tray and threw it all on the floor. This included lots of chewed up hot dog. Sick Nasty. I took Leah out..because she obviously was done eating and started to clean up the floor. While cleaning, Leah came up behind me and took her “non spill” sippy cup and poured juice down my crack. I just sat down and started crying. What else can happen in 15 min?

So what did I learn from this little incident? I learned it might be time to buy some mom jeans, I should probably buy new insides for the sippy cups or new sippy cups and I learned to always refill the wipe container if there are less than 24 wipes. We are going to Lawrence this afternoon and I cannot wait! I’m sure we will all be happy to see Grandma and Grandpa.



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  1. This is sooooooo funny! Not for you, but I am just laughing hysterically! Hope your day turns around quickly and I also hope Jack isn’t getting sick:)

  2. I agree with Laura. I am so sorry you had a rough day and that it made you cry–but it made me cry because of laughing so hard…at work…surrounded by tons of confused co-worker!

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